Standing Strong?

Never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
Clementine Paddleford

I read this quote back in June, and then heard it again the other day. It really encapsulates a lot of my attitude toward life these days. Or rather, it encapsulates the way I judge those in my world, even if I often fall victim to that wishbone issue myself. Funny how the things you find most annoying in others is exactly what you hate in yourself. Wimpy women drive me nuts, and yet so often I find myself giving in, talking myself out of things or rolling over. Why is it some people and situations have such an ability to revert me to that insecure teenager who doesn't feel she's worthy of being treated with respect?

How do I deal with those people and situations? Well, traditionally, I avoid them. I cut the people out of my life, do everything in my power not to get in those situations. But what I need to figure out is how to cope when the people or issues can't be ignored and shoved aside. How do I rise above, maintain my sense of self and not let myself sink to the levels of those around me?

Not surprisingly, this entry is inspired by the fact that there are several people/situations that fall into these categories in my life right now. Some people have treated me badly, some issues are entirely in my own head. I know I'm strong and capable of handling myself - and yet that fact is hard to remember at times. Trusting myself, my capabilities, my worthiness...not always my strong points.

And yet other times I feel like I can take on anything the world throws at me. How can I summon that strength and belief when I need it the most? Because these days my backbone should sport the following label:

WARNING: may revert to wishbone without warning...